Blogging

I am once again, a bad bad blogger. I keep meaning to sit down, and write, but I just haven't.

Part of me is scared to put what is going on in my mind and heart online, and part of me is just in this time of reflection, and waiting to see what God has on hold for the future.

I've been out of work since September 30th, its been almost 5 months. I had surgery at the end of November to see if they could figure out what the problem is with my hand. They found scar tissue on my radial nerve, and a lot of swelling. Since surgery my hand hasn't gotten any better. I do have days where it doesn't hurt as bad as others, but it always hurts. Its really frustrating and hard to know that I may never be pain free. I've had the tendinitis in my wrist for 10 years, but it has only gotten worse over the past four years, where I've had 3 surgeries.

I've struggled with my employer to get temporary disability. about 4 weeks ago I finally got a check, but the check was only for the first 5 weeks. I've submitted the paperwork they needed, but still haven't received another check. I've also filed paperwork with permanent disability. Since everything I do hurts my arm, I need an alternative to having to work in order to have some kind of income.

I hope this afternoon or tomorrow to get some more posts up about the fun things I've been doing.

Planning amanda's wedding has been a blast, she's getting married the day before Jims and my one year anniversary. I couldn't be happier for her and Steve if I tried. They're a wonderful couple. Its great to see Amanda SO happy.

Hanging out with some new friends. I made some great new friends from the musical, and we have been spending a lot of time together. They're a great group. and I'm so lucky to have them in my life now, I can't wait to get to know them better!

deafness

I am a minority.

I have a disability.

I am not ashamed of my disability, or who I am.

It is not a disability that affects my quality of life, or the way I live. It only affects the way I learn, or the effort I put into hearing. I can hear, talk on the phone, and listen to music, I just have to wear hearing aids while doing it. Since my medical insurance covers a portion of my hearing aids, that makes it a medical disability, right? Health insurance does not cover things that are not necessary.

I am 26 years old. I've tried to understand all of the "Deaf power" stuff. Yes, we're deaf, Yes we should have equal access to things. Yes we should not be discriminated against. But that doesn't mean deaf people should go out and demand equal access to things, and get everything for free because of their disability.

Life is what you make of it. People who have other medical conditions such as dyslexia, ADD, or learning disabilities learn to adjust the way they learn and work hard to make something of themselves. So many people out there have disabilities, but they do not let it hinder their future. They work as hard as they possibly can to get ahead in their life. It makes me SO Mad when people on one hand say "Deafness is not a disability, it is a culture" And then on the other hand they go and get SSI. Well, having SSI means your admitting to your disability. And that your not planning to achieve anything with your life. I know there are, as always, circumstances where SSI is not a bad thing.

Deafness IS a disability. Its how you let it affect your life that matters.

Be proud of who you are.

work hard, and get ahead, because you CAN do it.