Friendship, Love and Jesus

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Showing posts with label Shattered trust. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Shattered trust. Show all posts

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Shattered trust

This week has been an extremely painful, horrible week. I don't want to get into too many details, since its work related, and I'll probably get in trouble for posting it online, especially since several coworkers read my blog.

I'm feeling pretty lost. Pretty alone, and pretty unsure of who I can trust anymore, and that's a horrible feeling. Once trust has been lost, how do you get it back? When I finally reached that breaking point with my mother, it never came back, and it never will. So how do I do it now? How do I forgive people I have to see everyday, when every time I look into their eyes it hurts?

The bible says to forgive 77x7 times, but how? How do I? I don't know what to do next, or how to move on from this, or if I even can. My trust in some people has been shattered. My faith in my company is completely gone. My love for my coworkers has dwindled, and it breaks my heart. A month ago I considered them to be some of my closest friends. Now that's gone, and I'm not sure how to get it back.

This stress has made me physically ill. I've been nauseated all day, and I won't go into more details than that, I know you don't want details. I'm going to sleep. Maybe i'll wake up tomorrow feeling better, and feeling that all is right in this world.

I probably wont, but its worth a shot.

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